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Let It Go

Today is one of those days where I just want to curl up in a fuzzy blanket with hot tea, write in my prayer journal, and listen to Brooke Fraser music. I remembered this mantra that has always brought tranquility to my heart– I hope it does to yours too.

Love & Hairbrushes

At 23, I still have plenty to learn about life. However, throughout my experiences so far, there was one moment that shaped my perspective on what it means to love another person.

This moment did not come at the end of a date. It happened while brushing my mom’s hair.

I was standing next to her bed in the ICU of a hospital that I would grow very familiar with over the next month. She was heavily sedated with pain medications and unaware of my presence. I gently weaved a hairbrush around shaved spots and staples, thinking about how much things can change in two weeks…

I remembered the way we squeezed each others’ hands when the surgeon used the word “massive” to describe her brain tumor.

And how we went shoe shopping right after the MRI. My eyes watered when the sales person asked how my day was going.

And the way my family sat on my parents’ bed and prayed together the night before her surgery.

And how the entire hospital waiting room had emptied after 14 hours and we were the only ones left waiting.

As I brushed her hair, I realized that the person who had always supported me now needed my support. Everything that I had previously been concerned about– dating, exams, friends– went out the window. In the midst of my own selfishness, God called me to become a better daughter and a more selfless person.

That’s what love means to me. Not the fuzzy feelings you get when the boy you’re crushing on sends you a sweet text. Love is pulling yourself together and providing strength to someone who needs it. Love is putting your fears and anxiety aside to brush your mom’s hair when she cannot do it herself.

(Mom– If you read this, I love you)

Things I Love

Fast-Paced Cities

Sleeping in the Sun

Sunsets

Unexpected Beauty

Fresh Air

Yellow Flowers

Travel

Spiral Stairs

Classic Authors

Snow Cones

Cute Shoes

Gummy Bears

Courage

Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying,
“I will try again tomorrow.”

Winning the “Am I Good Enough?” Game

I wasted too much of my life playing the “am I good enough?” game.

I constantly compared myself to other women and felt inadequate if they appeared better than me.  This was not only devastating to my confidence and self-worth, but impossible to win. There will always be someone prettier, smarter, better dressed, and more talented than me. 

We attempt to fill the void of insecurity in many ways–a romantic relationship, friendships, popularity, achievement–but these will never be enough. Although it’s normal to seek acceptance and relationships with others, our security must come from God. His love and promises offer more security than anything else possibly could.

Here are some verses that help us recognize God’s truth when we feel inadequate:

Matthew 10:29-31

“Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.”

1 Peter 3:3-4

“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. ⁴ Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”

1 John 4:4

“You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.“

Colossians 2:10

 ”And in Him you have been made complete.”

Beth Moore provides a very comforting truth about security. “When you and I are triggered to expose the most vulnerable, broken parts of ourselves through a rush of insecurity, we can train ourselves to immediately recite this truth to our souls: ‘It’s okay. I’m completely covered [by God].’ And oddly, that very thought all by itself begins the healing. We are not nearly as likely to react with the same level of insecurity when we remember how well covered we are by God.”

God loves you. It’s not a boyfriend/girlfriend, best friends forever, close siblings kind of love… It’s a far greater love than you can imagine. So, when you start feeling jealous, inadequate or unworthy, close your eyes and know that you are completely covered in God’s love.

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Go Get ‘Em!

Richard Simmons says, “When I wake up in the morning, it’s like the red curtain goes up… I twirl around the room. I thank God for the day. I fluff my hair and yell, ‘GO GET ‘EM, RICHARD!’”

How awesome would it be if we all approached life like this? If we woke up with a smile on our face and the tenacity to seize each day! Most of us start our days off with a shrill alarm and a desire for just five more minutes of sleep.

I truly believe that happiness is a conscious choice, not the result of circumstances. We can’t just wait around expecting happiness to just show up someday. We must decide now that we won’t settle for anything less than a sensational life and start making decisions that will create a new reality.

I have always been a “morning person” and love starting my day off early. On a typical morning, I wake up three hours before work. I brush my teeth, put on my beat-up Nikes, grab my hot pink i-pod, and go for a run. When I get back from my workout, I put on some music, make myself breakfast and write in my prayer journal or strike a few yoga poses. By the time I head out the door, I’m already wide awake and energized.

What are you doing to produce and inspire happiness in your own life? Are you living on autopilot or do you fill your days with lovely things?

Of course, we all go through “down times.” Several times this week I had moments of sadness from missing someone. But they are just that–moments. I fully feel the sadness of missing someone, but I refuse to let that spiral into hours of missing someone. Instead of letting my mind focus on what I don’t have, I focus on everything I do have. I plan things that will bring sunshine to my day (or to someone else’s) and I keep going.

Here are some suggestions for how to bring sunshine to your day:

• Give compliments to everyone you come in contact with! It will make both of you feel amazing.

• Exercise! The endorphins will make you feel great. You don’t have to necessarily go to a gym either. Do something you love, whether it’s dance, yoga, running, biking, or whatever.

• Start your day off with affirmations. Look in the mirror and say, “I love you, you’re beautiful!” or “I forgive myself for not being perfect, I’m living the best way I know how.” You may not believe yourself at first. Keep saying it until you do believe it.

• Write down tangible goals. Picture how you want your life to look five years from now and break that down into smaller goals. You’ll feel so amazing as you take steps toward making your dreams come true!

• Find an art that you’re passionate about–music, dance, writing, painting, scrapbooking. Use this activity to inspire creativity and release tensions in your life.

• SMILE! It will make you feel better and you’ll make tons of new friends.

• Go for a walk on your lunch break. Listen to a happy playlist on your i-pod and come back to work feeling re-energized.

• Eliminate things and/or people who bring you down. I deactivated my Facebook account to avoid being asked one more time if I want to “reconnect” with my recent ex-boyfriend and to prevent myself from stalking his photos. Pathetic? Kind of. Liberating? Oh yes.

• Volunteer for a cause you care about. A huge part of finding your own happiness is finding ways to bring happiness to others.

• Organize your space. Clean out your apartment, closets, purses, office, etc. Get rid of the clutter and make room for better things to enter your life.

I am very thankful for all the love in my life. I’m thankful for the encouragement I get from this blog and how writing gives me freedom from the past and confidence to keep moving forward. I’m thankful for the many ways that life allows me to express my soul.

I hope today brings you wonderful surprises and that life blows you lots of kisses! You deserve a life full of peace, love, and unfettered joy.

Dating Advice From My Little Brother

My youngest sibling (pictured to the left) came over to my apartment and had a sleepover last night. We had an amazing time looking at Christmas lights, staying up late watching Pink Panther cartoons, and chatting about life. These quotes are the greatest hits of his insight on dating:

“I don’t want a girlfriend. Having a girlfriend is like having a really expensive pet with no guarantee on its lifespan.”

“Jaclyn, I think your expectations are too high. If you end up meeting someone that perfect, it will probably be like talking to a brick wall.”

“He dumped you on the phone?! I guess that’s better than getting dumped over a text… which is better than getting dumped on Facebook… which is better than not being told at all and having him just show up one day with another girl. You should consider yourself quite lucky.”

If you ever need a fresh perspective on dating or anything else, I highly recommend seeking advice from a middle schooler. As adults, we tend to overanalyze and complicate everything… but sometimes the answers are quite simple.

Carve Your Blessings in Stone

Write your troubles in the sand,

Carve your blessings in stone.

Photo Credit to: Cuba Gallery